Sex Time
That got your attention, didn't it?
Let's face it. I'm fucking PG-13. I don't even rate the first Revenge of the Nerds, so if you expect this post to be any more exciting than the rest, your sadly mistaken. I really hate to disappoint, but then, I also revel in it. Whadda ya gonna do?
At any rate, I've been thinking about a friend of mine from elementary school whose parents were trying to have another kid. Really hard. Oh boy were they trying. It got to the point where, for a period of a few months, the Dad would come in from the fields (yup- farmers) for lunch and then an hour of sex time. During this time my friend and her little sister would be kicked out of the house for an hour. Not just asked to play in their rooms or the basement or anything but they were to leave the house. Regardless of the weather. They had a little play house built in the back so they could play out of the house. At the time it seemed really weird to me that not only did her parents have sex but that they knew when they were having it. I remember my friend and her sister getting into a typical sibling argument while we were outside one day. The Dad whipped open the window (in 20 degree weather) and leaned halfway out, clearly naked but with the curious bits cleverly shielded by a spot of curtain, and yelled "Can't this wait 15 god damn minutes!". After which he slammed down the window and yanked the curtain shut.
Boy, sex with him must have been fun.
I remember my friend explaining to me why we had to get out of the house the very first time I had come to visit.
"They're having sex in there and they don't want us to see it." She grimaced, "I don't want to anyway."
Her parents divorced a year later and there was no baby to show for their efforts. It didn't really seem like they were having any fun, anyway. Making a baby should be way fucking fun. That's what orgasms are for. Fun! Because, God knows, when you've got a little alien puking all over you, giving you lip and making you want to lock up shop forever you need to remember "Damn, I had a nice triple O with a twist and a little amuse bouche", suddenly it all seems worth it. Yeah, that and the unconditional love, yadda yadda yadda.
Let's face it. I'm fucking PG-13. I don't even rate the first Revenge of the Nerds, so if you expect this post to be any more exciting than the rest, your sadly mistaken. I really hate to disappoint, but then, I also revel in it. Whadda ya gonna do?
At any rate, I've been thinking about a friend of mine from elementary school whose parents were trying to have another kid. Really hard. Oh boy were they trying. It got to the point where, for a period of a few months, the Dad would come in from the fields (yup- farmers) for lunch and then an hour of sex time. During this time my friend and her little sister would be kicked out of the house for an hour. Not just asked to play in their rooms or the basement or anything but they were to leave the house. Regardless of the weather. They had a little play house built in the back so they could play out of the house. At the time it seemed really weird to me that not only did her parents have sex but that they knew when they were having it. I remember my friend and her sister getting into a typical sibling argument while we were outside one day. The Dad whipped open the window (in 20 degree weather) and leaned halfway out, clearly naked but with the curious bits cleverly shielded by a spot of curtain, and yelled "Can't this wait 15 god damn minutes!". After which he slammed down the window and yanked the curtain shut.
Boy, sex with him must have been fun.
I remember my friend explaining to me why we had to get out of the house the very first time I had come to visit.
"They're having sex in there and they don't want us to see it." She grimaced, "I don't want to anyway."
Her parents divorced a year later and there was no baby to show for their efforts. It didn't really seem like they were having any fun, anyway. Making a baby should be way fucking fun. That's what orgasms are for. Fun! Because, God knows, when you've got a little alien puking all over you, giving you lip and making you want to lock up shop forever you need to remember "Damn, I had a nice triple O with a twist and a little amuse bouche", suddenly it all seems worth it. Yeah, that and the unconditional love, yadda yadda yadda.
posted by Bree O'Connor at 12:52 AM
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